What am I supposed to write about today? Global warming? OK here's my version.
I live in a place that has this unfortunate reputation. It was built upon the world's largest landfill. It can be seen from space. I know I know, you wish you were me. (Trust me, you do not wish you were me. But that's a story for another day.)
This lovely place has that certain special aroma on hot summer days, you know, ode to shitbag or something or other. It's awful. One cannot breathe while driving on the highway that runs through it. It is unbelievable. And what's worse is the fact that people live incredibly close to it. I don't know the exact figures but it is within blocks. Who the hell would choose of their own free will to live so close to a dump? Closed or not, you have to realize there are extreme health risks don't you? Like the cancer clusters that have formed? (I am purposely not citing sources because it would give away where I live.) I mean why would you do that? Are things that bad where you currently live that you say to yourself "Even living right next to the dump is better then this?". I just don't get it.
So I'm guessing that because people live in a place that used to be a dump, they act like the entire place still is a dump. They throw all manner of things out the windows of their cars- fast food containers, tissues, cigarette boxes, whatever. You know this is bad enough. It infuriates me. I honk my horn and yell various expletives which of course doesn't do anything but let me vent a bit. But dude, DO NOT THROW THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR MOONROOF!! IT LANDS ON MY WINDSHIELD YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! I don't need your crap on my windshield because you can't wait 5 fucking minutes until you get home to throw it in your own garbage. No I wouldn't even suggest recycling it because I'm sure that you don't know what the word recycle means. You fucking douchebag! Die!
*deep breath* OK I feel better. This is how global warming has affected me. The place I live is disgusting. Several people who live here are also disgusting. They have no care for the land they live on. I suddenly feel like the star of this commercial from the 70's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4ozVMxzNAA
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